The first guide on how to flirt was published about two thousand years ago by an ancient Roman poet named Ovid. It was called ‘Ars Amatoria.’ In the modern age, we’ve changed so does the rules of flirting
Communication – all kinds of it – is the backbone of human relationships. Our sophisticated means of interacting as a species is what sets us apart from other animals; what helped us build entire civilizations; what allows us to express our emotions and opinions, bonding beyond instinct.
But then, most would agree that in spite of centuries of training we are still a long way from acing the act of comprehensible communication in terms of our emotions and thoughts. Perhaps because we tend to see it as a one-way road, an individual act as opposed to a reciprocation.
Or, perhaps because we overlook the impact of culture in our language. This is either verbal, symbolic, gestural, or any other form of expression. So, how social stereotypes affect the way relate to each other. Whatever the reasons may be, communication touches all spheres of life. When it comes to interacting with people of the opposite sex, it is no different.
Watch: The Difference Between Flirting And Being Nice
All men have, at some point, considered how to ask a girl out, and when that happens, our flirting abilities (or lack thereof) spring to mind. In essence, to flirt is to establish that first bond with a girl (or a guy), be it through conversation or a look. But, to truly learn how to flirt with women, one must first look beyond the action, to the underlying factors that may make or break communication.
The notion of flirting is nothing new.
The first guide on how to flirt was published about two thousand years ago. This was by an ancient Roman poet named Ovid. It was called ‘Ars Amatoria,’ ‘The Art of Love, where he claimed that he taught cupid everything he knows.
So, What Exactly Is Flirting?
Flirting is a highly complex form of mating dance, which exhibits a man and a woman’s intelligence. Flirting, in modern times, is a form of a game. When we were children, we would play games with each other in order to get to know one another. Now that we’re older but the general rules of the game have not.
For example, when you introduce yourself to another person, you use the same tactics to get them to like you that you would use to get the opposite gender to like you. You follow much the same principles; the only difference being that there’s no intention of getting that person into bed. Meaning, likability is the key!
Here are some tips that would bring your flirting game up to the mark
It’s All About the Eye Contact
Your eyes are probably your most important flirting tool. We tend to think of our eyes mainly as a means of receiving information, but they are also extremely high-powered transmitters of vital social signals.
Looking directly into the eyes of another person is such a powerful, emotionally loaded act of communication that we normally restrict it to very brief glances only.
In fact, there are various signs which can be used to portray emotions as well as read them, like:
- Prolonged eye contact between two people indicates intense emotion and is either an act of love or an act of hostility.
- If the woman maintains eye contact with you for more than one second, chances are she might return your interest.
- The key to holding powerful eye contact is to focus on one particular eye and not to drift between the two.
- When flirting, only flip between the eyes and mouth, this is called the flirting triangle and works like a charm.
- Don’t over-do it though, as you may come across as a sexual predator.
Signs That It Is Backfiring
There are some signs that you absolutely need to look out for, these signs can warn you that it’s going wrong and you might either need to pull out a massive card or just drop out respectfully.
Well, here you go:
- If her feet start to turn and point away from you, it can be a sign that her attention is directed elsewhere, or that she is thinking about moving away.
- If a woman only has her head turned towards you, and the rest of the body is pointing in another direction, this is a sign that you do not have her full attention.
- Leaning backwards and supporting the head on one hand is a sign of boredom.
- Closed’ postures with arms folded and legs tightly crossed indicate disagreement or dislike.
Remember, all of us are looking for new ways of understanding and being understood, we are also looking for the special ‘someone’.
Since flirting is often the way in which we begin romantic interactions that can lead to a relationship, it makes sense that we deal with it as consciously as possible.
So, honesty is key!: Women can figure out when you are not being yourself, calm down and play it cool!