SWATI ARORA, DKODING MEDIA
It doesn’t matter who you are dating, your gender, and your sexuality or your age because there is always going to be the third person in whatever relationship you have.
Umm! Don’t worry I am not talking about in-laws. It’s something much worse might be.
Even if you are the chill girlfriend, nearly every woman ends up in the custody battle for her boyfriend against her arch-nemesis, otherwise known as his best friend.
If you are seriously thinking of running off with your boyfriend’s best friend, there may be a lot of points worth considering before you do. Things can get especially tricky if you have been with your current boyfriend for a long time. You would be smart to take time to meditate on what you really want out of life, relationship and love.
Crushing on your boyfriend’s friend can be a sign that you are unhappy in your relationship for any number of reasons like it lacks of excitement, the newness has long gone or you feel neglected.
But many times your relationship can be perfectly fine and crushes on attractive people occur just because you are alive and breathing. Having a crush can make you feel a combination of feelings like lust and excitement or guilt and shame because you are having romantic feelings about another person.
What do you do when you like your boyfriend’s best friend?
Can you outlast your crush?
Take some time to consider whether this is just a crush, or if you have genuine feelings for this person. People in long-term relationships tend to get bored around the 2 or 3-year mark. This is completely normal, and in most relationships, this boredom will fade, and you’ll head back to being smitten as a kitten with your beau.
If you are feeling bored in your relationship and are entertaining a schoolgirl crush on your boyfriend’s best friend just as something to do, or something passing, your best bet would be to wait out your crush and work on your current relationship.
Identify your relationship woes.
If you’re having feelings for someone else, you need to take a deep look at why. When you love someone, there is usually a connection that’s formed that makes you want to be exclusive or feel the slightest bit of healthy attachment to them.
When this goes missing there is usually a solid reason behind it.
Can you really leave your mate?
You need to make a weighty pro/con list about your mate. If you’re entertaining the idea of taking up with his best friend, you need to view it as more than just a fantasy. Remember that while this person may seem alluring or ideal right now, sooner or later reality will set in and you’ll come to know his flaws and weaknesses just as you did with your current boyfriend.
Break it to the friend
If you are not planning on leaving your boyfriend, and don’t wish to hurt anyone’s feelings, you may simply want to approach the best friend and say that you feel like a flirtatious vibe has been going around.
Tell him you want to work on your relationship and won’t be engaging in any flirtation with him any longer.
Practice your charm and good use of feminine wiles to get out of this conversation casually and without any awkward tension afterward.
Show him respect
Even if you are 100% positive you’re going to leave your mate, whether you end up with his friend or not, you still need to show him dignity and respect. This means you shouldn’t be flirting with his friend right in front of him. Other no-no’s for respectful relationship behavior is not sleeping with his best friend or having a secret rendezvous whether they are romantic or not.
Whether you choose to stay with your guy or go with his best friend or just get out of the entire situation, remember to always handle things with maturity and grace.
Don’t resort to cheating and causing more chaos.
Instead, be honest with what you feel and do what you think is best for everyone who is involved.