Swati Arora, DKODING Media
Dating someone with anxiety issues or an anxiety disorder can be horribly stressful. Sometimes it can feel like the anxiety is a third person in the relationship, someone who wriggles between you and your partner. This person constantly sows doubt and confusion.
Anxiety in a relationship is perhaps one of the most daunting experiences in existence.
It can leave a profound impact on both your relationship and your quality of living.
Anxiety in a relationship happens when you feel that the relationship has you by the throat, almost suffocating you.
If you have an anxiety disorder, then you already know it can make life way more difficult than it needs to be. Its likely impacts how you feel at work, while out with friends, and it may even keep you up at night.
but anxiety can also affect your relationship by introducing stress, doubt, worry and the mistakes and argument that can come about as a result.
It’s hard to keep anxiety from affecting a relationship.
When you are barely managing to stay above water yourself, it takes every part of you not to lash out or do something irrational because it’s hard enough without having someone else to love and care for besides yourself.
Here are relationship missteps you or someone you love might make if they have anxiety
Trying to control the relationship
Having anxiety can lead a person to try and control their surroundings in an effort to manage their anxiety. Anxiety makes you feel like everything is out of whack, like the floor beneath you could crumble at any moment.
In an effort to reduce this feeling, you or your loved one might develop the basic response of trying to control the relationship son as to manage the situation.
But this often backfires as you end up trying to control the other’s behavior.
This is a major sign of anxiety and it can impact how comfortable you feel when it comes to opening up to others, including your partner. You may be concerned about the consequences of what you say but if there’s one person on the planet you should be honest with, it’s going to be your partner.
While it can take some getting used to and some major trust, try to stop editing yourself. It may be difficult at first, but with a supportive partner, you will see it’s definitely worth it.
Making something out of nothing
Everything is magnified with anxiety. When even the slightest thing can set you off, it’s easy to lose it and snap over something and insignificant. To keep this from happening, it’s important to try and keep a clear perspective of things and use a calming practice to give yourself the space you need to let that pent-up frustration out regularly.
Expecting your partner to fix your anxiety
While your partner should definitely be aware of your anxiety, and be as supportive as possible, it doesn’t help to put the pressure on them to cure it. If we expect them to assuage every fear or constantly provide reassurance, we are putting them in a position that they are meant to occupy responsibility for our anxiety.
Doubting the relationship
If you find yourself constantly doubting your partner’s commitment or the health of your relationship, it can help to take a step back and see if your doubts are stemming from anxiety. People with anxiety have negative self-talk, which can cause them not to trust that they are loved.
This doubt can frustrate a partner and eventually cause them to give up on the relationship.
A lack of presence
Few things are as necessary for a relationship as just being present for the one you love. And anxiety screws with that masterfully. With anxiety, it’s extremely difficult to stay present to what’s going on around you because you are so overwhelmed with what’s going on between your years.
Since anxiety can lead to feelings of irritability, you might find yourself lashing out at your partner or responding to them in an aggressive way. You might also notice that you can’t have a conversation with them without it quickly going downhill.
While it’d be nice if you could snap your fingers and no longer have anxiety, it often requires a lot of effort to fix it.