You and your partner should know everything about each other well before things get serious. But there are certain hidden treasures of your life that it’s okay to keep some secrets.
Being honest in relationships helps. If there is any secret that will impact your relationship in the future, it is better to reveal it.
But otherwise, there is no need to share the silly or embarrassing hidden secrets to your partner.
Why do we keep secrets from our significant other?
Not everyone feels completely comfortable engaging in self-disclosure, even to the people we hold most dear to our heart. Early in a relationship, it seems particularly difficult to know just how much to reveal to the other person.
However, you would think that by the time a couple gets really close, they’d be unlikely to hold back.
But can a secret stay a secret?
Most secrets don’t stay a secret for too long, especially if someone else knows about it. The problem occurs when the cat is let out of the bag, and the person on the receiving end hasn’t had time to process the extraordinary information.
You need to get to know your partner better and see if they are the type of person who won’t judge you for the things that you have no control over.
You can’t control how they will react, but you can at least build enough trust to be comfortable about telling them your secrets… eventually.
The secrets we keep from our partners
Past relationships
Sometimes if a partner has cheated in the past, they won’t tell their new partners about it. They are often afraid they will be judged or that it will immediately infuse a sense of doubt or insecurity into the current relationship.
The number of people you’ve slept with
People who have never experimented much in relations might have nothing to hide, but the rest of us who have gone on a dating spree during our teen age days would prefer to hide it now from the partner.
Gross habits we can’t stop doing
Everyone does strange things when they’re alone and it’s totally normal. If you indulged in some weird behavior while you were alone, such as eating an entire cake while the binge-watching bad TV in your underwear. But it’s hard to stop.
Our real insecurities
Appearances and career accomplishments are the usual suspects when it comes to insecurities, but some can go deeper, like questioning one’s self-worth or their ability to keep a relationship.
Fears
Some of us suffer from some irrational fears. Unless a partner is too close to us and never judges us. We’d prefer to keep such fears a secret. It could be fear of the darkness, or cats, or anything else which might scare us.
Family problems
Not everybody is lucky to have a peaceful and joyous childhood. Traumatic incidents of childhood and certain family disputes are to be kept hidden as not everyone can understand your story.
Kinky desires
Some of us do have crazy fantasies and kinky desires. But unless you have a truly understanding partner, it is better to hide such desires to avoid being judged as pervert.
What we look like when we sleep
Itchy, lacy thingies that women wear every night, the spotless face beside yours early in the morning looking as fresh as fresh can be! It’s usually slathered with gunk, serums, creams and a cherry on top.
Financial mistakes
Most of us do certain financial mistakes, they make us look foolish. Therefore, we generally hide such things from our partners. Not only that, men never declares their actual income to their partners in order to keep some money with them.
Who we dated in high school
Admitting who we dated in high school just leaves room for us to explain what happened when we were dating. High school romances are not for the faint hearted.
Secrets exist because being honest with someone means that you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position.
Once you are ready to open up to someone, those secrets will start to become shared secrets-which is so much better because someone else is helping you carry the weight of it all.
