Don’t we all just hate parties when we trying to quit alcohol or are on medications and hence have to stay sober?
The most annoying question at a party is ‘why are you not drinking?’ followed by ‘Just have one buddy’ and a glass forced into your hands.
We have all been there. When you were trying to quit alcohol, had an important meeting the next morning, were chosen as the lucky designated driver or were just not in the mood for ‘shots shots shots everybody’. It’s tough being sober around intoxicated people who are too drunk that sometimes they even invent their own language.
So how to survive this mind-numbing situation you ask? Fret not our sober friend we have come up with super quirky ways to have a survival mechanism when surrounded by alcohol and deal with alcohol-induced drunk babies. (We may have written them while intoxicated so read at owners risk)
1. Laugh. A LOT.
Ever had a regret of not choosing comedy as your career plan? This is the perfect platform to use those jokes and witty one-liners as no one wouldn’t even remember most of your stinky ass humour. You can even drop mean honest truth bomb and diss some people you have been hating on for a while (We wouldn’t recommend trying this on your boss though, you need a job next day right).
2. Just pretend it.
What can be more entertaining than honing your acting skills at a party? Slurp that ginger ale and go hahaha! You can be anybody you want to be. Act your heart out. Go all out and even throw up a little (just Kidding). (Or are we?)
3. Shake that booty
You don’t need tequila running in your veins to twerk a little. If you are super bored and aren’t shy to own up the stage then we would recommend giving everyone a show. The best part about this is you can rock those weird moves you have been practicing in front of the mirror. Do the chicken dance, jazz hands or even a naagin dance if you have guts. (Remember no guts any glory, shake it for that Instagram story)
4. Party with people who talks a lot.
People who can hold a conversation are great but people who can talk a lot while being under the influence are exemplary. You will get to hear such bizarre facts and gossips from such people that you have never even heard of. It’s half past noon nobody knows what happening and suddenly this super drunk person starts bitching about their mother-in-law. Bring out the popcorn and be entertained. Trust us; a drunken person gossip beats everything.
5. Get a sober friend along.
What’s more boring than not drinking? A friend not drinking. You two sober souls can keep a check on each other while laughing at drunk dancers. Having a stern friend or a buddy with a resolute is better as your tongue and mind can play mind tricks on you to give in. So don’t go stag and make most of the ‘call your friend’ button.
6. Give in to the gluttony.
Imagine all the food you could eat and keep it down. The best way in our survival guide is to indulge in food (glorious food). Eating when you are drunk is a task- We have to balance our plates, walk miles in our drunken state to that salad bar and keep it down without letting someone be the victim of our throw up party.
7. Help the host
Yes, this might seem like a task and you might not want to spend your Saturday serving fish sticks. But it’s better than waking up with a hangover before you have to give a presentation the next day. So give your friend or the person handling the drunkards your helping hand. Add some brownies points in your karma bag.
Raise your glass of water and cheers to sobriety.
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